reconstructions of my own

For those of you unfamiliar with Argentine history, the period from 1976 to 1983 was known as la Guerra Sucia, the Dirty War; it was an age of state-sponsored violence against the left. Students, activists, political dissenters, innocent bystanders and witnesses were crushed by the hand of the military regime. Depending on who you ask, casualty estimates range from 9,000 to 30,000 people dead or disappeared. The effect of this violence still grips Argentine politics and culture.

An important facet of the healing process since coming out of the Dirty War is the reconstruction of a collective memory. By piecing together the evidence--the accounts, the pictures, the prisons, the DNA--there's this idea that telling this story, reconstructing these events can mobilize the public: "Never again will we let this happen. Forever will these names, these stories, these people live on in the tale of Argentina for the sake of our society and our posterity."

Of course, reconstructing this memory has its own shortcomings. One narrative, the popular narrative, dominates the reconstruction. The other narratives are dumped or are on the fringe. Maybe that's what they deserve. How can you justify the deaths of all these people? It's apparent that most Argentinians have not bought the "security" argument posed by the military rulers of the day and their sympathizers. Why should they after suffering so much?

This is not a post to pass judgment on a society I do not yet fully understand, though I do have my own opinions to be shared at a more appropriate time.

This post is an introduction to my own reconstructions of memory, and in essence, a tribute to the life I live, the people I love, the things I do. How will I remember my narrative?

I'm cutting back on the realism. Creating and recreating artistic, literary, and cultural capital--a piece of you, a piece of me, a piece of the world, a piece of imagination, and my place in a collection of collections. This is as much about me as it is or ever will be about Argentina.Since when has art ever been art for art's sake?

i dream of patagonia

lazy thursday,

A run-down of what's happened since I last posted:

--Kat visited.
--My hours at JC Penney were cut.
--I finished reading The Five People You Meet in Heaven, The Lovely Bones, and Tuesdays with Morrie.
--I've played a lot of video games.
--I visited W&M.
--I've eaten an exorbitant amount of hazelnuts.

All that, of course, coincides with preparing to leave on February 10, which brings up a few issues on its own.

Leaving:
At the end of last semester, I was pretty ready to leave William & Mary behind for a while. Being President of a social fraternity is by no means easy and I wanted so badly for that stress to go away. Letting go, though, is hard. Visiting this past weekend made it even harder. Everyone has some sort of underlying understanding that life goes on whether you're there or not, but actually seeing it happen, seeing everyone prepare for the coming semester is pretty difficult to take. It's harder because I don't know what lies ahead, so I'm actually very ready to get my new life started.

Planning ahead:
As much as I'd like to plan out my whole time in Argentina, I've realized that I'm just going to have to go with the flow when I get there. It's impossible to figure out what my days will be like, how much I'm going to spend on food, bus and train routes for travel. Best I've found are hostel prices in Bariloche. I'm partly concerned because I want to budget my money (or lack thereof) appropriately. So, as a matter of making information more accessible to those that come after me, I'm going to try and provide the following details with every trip or major event that transpires: a simple description of what I did, how much it cost, and how long it took me to travel or do whatever it is I'm doing. I may not stick to it, but I'll try. I know it would help me out a lot now to know what I'm getting myself into, but I guess that's part of the adventure.

Making the most of it:
Kat got me a toy camera for Christmas. I'm determined to take some awesome pictures as soon as I know how to use it properly. I'm also taking my digital camera. I've never been very good about taking pictures of people or what I'm seeing. It's very touristy, makes me feel awkward. I've gotta suck it up. Other goals include drinking less (which will be less money spent, more nights remembered), making friends with the students in our group and people in La Plata, eating a lot of beef, doing community services, traveling, and not blowing all my money.

I promise to be more eloquent, witty, creative, et cetera in future posts. During my visit to Williamsburg, Spencer flushed out his nose with some sort of odd medical contraption. The water rushed up one nostril, and with more force than a jet engine, shot out the other. It looked utterly painful, but Spencer said it felt refreshing. Yeah, I'm just trying to flush out my thoughts the way Spencer flushed out his nasal cavity. Gross.

thinking

The most exciting and the most nerve-racking part of this whole experience is not knowing... not knowing what it's going to be like, not knowing the people, not knowing if I'm actually going to make it there without problems or complications. I suppose that's all part of the adventure, and I'll take advantage of all these new possibilities when I get there, but it's truly agonizing pondering a life I know nothing about. All I have right now are the things others have told me, Google Images, and my sometimes tenuous, inconsistent, and strife-ridden imagination.